The New Death Positive Movement
My epiphany about our culture needing a more sane and humane approach to death and dying came just over five years ago when my husband died suddenly. I didn't know at the time that my revelation was part of a growing cultural shift that some are calling the death positive movement (see Short List below). It's a growing group of people who see demystifying death and bringing it back into our worlds as part of a very healthy way of approaching life.
As I began educating myself on better ways of approaching death I realized there’s enormous number of resources out there: some profound, some humorous, many pithy, and some that were too pop psych or woo-woo for my taste.
In creating the Alliance, one of our goals is to have in one place a compendium of curated resources with some New Hampshire specific information and with resources we consider top notch for everyone regardless of where you are.
In the Resources section of our website we've started with a few of our favorite books and video resources. Some have been particularly useful in working through deaths of loved ones and others have enlarged our understanding of cultural, ethical, legal, and faith based perspectives.
We’ll be adding them and invite you to send what you consider really helpful and wise. Below is a short list that includes two articles that changed my thinking.
Because of copyright laws we can't reproduce the actual articles and instead give you links. If there's an article you want to read but cannot access it in the New York Times or Boston Globe for instance, drop me a line and I can probably share it with you from my own account. You can always reach me here.
As we build this resource we could really use your help if you're comfortable doing basic website content. Each newsletter will feature a few new resources and they will be on our Resources page. Also don't forget to look at our Events page for upcoming talks, workshops, and the like. If recordings are available they will be put in the Video part of the Resources section.
Everyone approaches this most profound of subjects in their own way. At the Alliance we realized early on it was critical for us to see issues around death and dying outside our own individual perspectives, really widen our collective view. We created a Learning Community and studied together for months. We’re now contemplating launching an on-line book (or film, video etc.) club for anyone as we head into winter. We want to know if people would be interested so here is a short survey - please answer. What book would you like to read?
Short List
“The Positive Death Movement Comes to Life” Death cafes, death doulas, “Ask a Mortician,” DeathLab — once the province of goth subculture, death is having a moment in the sun. New York Times, June 22, 2018.
This story opened my eyes to how it can (should?) be, if we wish:
At His Own Wake, Celebrating Life and the Gift of Death - Tormented by an incurable disease, John Shields knew that dying openly and without fear could be his legacy, if his doctor, friends and family helped him. New York Times, May 25, 2017.
This article become a touchstone for me and many others. I still remember the sensation of reading it, and thinking, this could be me:
The Last Day of Her Life - When Sandy Bem found out she had Alzheimer’s, she resolved that before the disease stole her mind, she would kill herself. The question was, when? New York Times Magazine, May 14, 2015